head-butting my grandson

Here is Charlie my grandson a few months ago being sung to by his mum.  Just love the connection between mum and baby.  So sweet to share these moments.  Not like my last online Skype call with Charlie.  My son was holding his iPad above Charlie and I was talking to my grandson in the UK face to face, when suddenly the iPad fell out of the holder and hit Charlie on the forehead a hard blow.  The iPad was ignored on the floor while the baby was comforted and I on Malta was now aware that as far as Charlie was concerned his granny had just head butted him!  Felt so awful and guilty despite there being nothing I could have done to prevent it.  Such are the dangers of the virtual world.  Instead of sweet nothings you inflict damage.  Sigh…….

Mother does not always know best!

I was a rather novice mother.  Being the youngest of my family I had zero experience of looking after youngsters.  So when I gave birth to my first son I remember the sheer fear that he was suddenly my responsibility.  I distinctly remember feeding him in the hospital bed and then ringing the nurse to return him to his crib.  When she asked why I did not do it myself I answered that I had never walked and carried a small baby and was afraid I may drop him.  I was serious! 

Being allowed to leave the hospital with this small vulnerable creature was terrifying and seemed completely wrong.  How would he survive with me!  It was a cold day and we had to put him in a one-piece coat for the first time.  A lovely elaborate outfit with zips that undid at the top and bottom if you needed to change him.  I have to say despite my fears our son was an ideal baby.  He slept and when not sleeping fed, in fact he was everything that reassured a rather nervous mother like me.  He smiled at everyone and held out his hands to even passing strangers to be picked up.  He just seemed really normal and exceptionally friendly.

That day for the first time he was crying.  It threw me but I changed his nappy to see if that helped.  It didn’t.  I tried to feed him and that didn’t help either.  By now I was running out of ideas, this had never happened before and his cry was louder and more pained.  I carried him, tried to put him to sleep by pushing him in the buggy outside.  Even that did not work and I was about to just let him cry, after all perhaps he was becoming spoiled?  If I just left him in the bedroom for a while alone, to cry himself out, he would learn that crying for attention was no way to behave!

Then, I noticed that the zip at his neck was embedded in his flesh.  While pulling up the zip I had caught a piece of his flesh in it.  The poor thing, how long had he suffered?  Once I released him he quickly returned to his usual happy and friendly nature and didn’t seem to bare any grudges for my blatant incompetence.  That night when he slept I cried beside his cot, furious at my carelessness and devastated at causing him pain.