Pokey and the fact that shit floats

Sarah said they came in angry and armed.  They had pushed past her mother at the door and they now stood looming over her in the living room.  The smallest long nosed man held a revolver and the tall red-faced lad had a rifle.  She knew their names, they were all from our village.  The nervous red haired one was called Stan, the long nosed one was nicknamed Pokey and the third Dave had been our class at primary school.  Stan held his rifle embarrassingly as if not comfortable in the tidy living room with it.  Sarah’s mother was terrified and wept at the doorway crying “what’s happening?”.  Pokey began,

“You’ve been going out with the other side”, he told Sarah, “that’s not allowed”. He continued with venom, “If your father was alive he’d have sorted this but he isn’t so we are here to do the job”.

Pokey stood, his lower lip puckered and he was nipping it repeatedly between his finger and thumb in a nervous gesture.  The revolver in his other hand swung from side to side with the same nervousness.  Sarah thought she was going to die in her small tidy living room aged seventeen never having lived at all.  Pokey continued, “You’re going to stop seeing him right”, he looked at her mother, “and we mean business, if we have to come back…”  He let the silence hang and all the time Pokey squeezed and released his lower lip so hard it stood out white and proud.  Sarah thought her heart would explode with fear. 

Even the next day when she told me of the event at school she cried with the memory of it all.  Her mother hadn't slept the whole night and Sarah had reassured her that everything was settled.  It was all okay.  The three men had taken her word that she would end the relationship and she had.  Since her father died, Sarah felt it her duty to support her mother and even now facing this trauma she felt shame that she had brought such terror to her widowed mother.  I listened burning with rage that three such idiots could inflict such damage on innocent people.  Personally, I felt that if her father had been alive they would not have dared knock on the door.  But a young widow and teenager was obviously fair game for the local thugs. 

That’s the thing about when society breaks down, it is not the local doctor or friendly street cleaner that suddenly turn toxic.  When the police and the army withdrew from our village it was the vicious and malignant that came into their own. Intimidating at will and feeling themselves the village heroes by targeting the vulnerable.  The very worst of society suddenly feel empowered to do what they want.  I met Pokey shortly after and told him exactly what I thought of him and his friends.  We had a heated conversation and I informed him that I would be going out of my way to date every single person from the opposing community on sheer principle.  This seemed very noble and righteous at the time.  I was on a crusade and informed Pokey I would much rather be dead than be dictated to by a little shit like him.  It was weird how empowered you can be but also very foolish at the same time.  

After all, it is one thing to announce you are going to date across the cultural barrier and quite another thing doing it.  I had never had a boyfriend of any sort so was not equipped for the task I had set myself.  In fact, four years passed without my having any romance whatsoever and gradually my heart went out of the whole affair.   With each year that passed I felt my failure anew as only teenagers can.  Total humiliation was reached at the five-year mark.  Sarah met and married Dave, our classmate and villain!  I began to suspect that the whole thing had not worked out well for me at all.  It could have been my imagination but I felt that Stan, Dave and Pokey and probably both sides of the community were sneering at my failure.

I went to university in Coleraine, eventually married, had kids and moved abroad.  Decades passed and then this year I returned to Northern Ireland, for a holiday, and was watching the TV in my Mum’s home when there on the screen was Pokey.  As thin nosed as ever but now thick set, dressed in a suit and tie and being introduced as the elected representative of the community.  He was being interviewed and as he listened to the question he pulled at his lower lip before answering.  Suddenly, it was as if it was yesterday and my anger returned as raw as before.    I tell you all that there is a truth in the saying shit floats, and in the words of Forrest Gump, that is all I am going to say about that!