I tire of me do you tire of you?
All the plans to improve and refine feel like feather chisels on rock.
The ‘me’ remains unchanged.
Stubborn and dark, unflinching in the face of a mighty desire for change.
At times there is a small movement the boulder begins to shift,
to turn agonisingly and roll up the steep slope.
You feel the excitement of real change!
I may not carve on this granite surface
but perhaps I can elevate it
with my shoulder to the edifice,
I feel momentum build.
You have overcome the power of inertia and gained traction at last.
The heart is exalted,
what is not possible now?
Then, your foot slips,
the boulder jerks back and runs down the hill.
Laughing at its sudden freedom.
You sink onto your knees in despair.
All that effort and there is the result.
The granite ‘you’ is even lower down the hill than when you began.
It’s hard to begin the trudge downwards to begin again.
But you will!
This constant effort will take time and break your heart many times.
You will want to give up many times,
and grow so strong in tackling this task
that you will barely recognise yourself.
Such is life, Godspeed!
