Showing posts with label defined. fish. Show all posts
Showing posts with label defined. fish. Show all posts

Monday, 14 May 2012

Getting cold and getting old


It is so cold I am sitting with a hot water bottle on my lap as I type.  There are several facets to growing older and one for me is the coldness of my extremities.   My hands and feet are like cold Icelandic fish and refuse to warm up.  A friend and I were discussing this aging business and there are some beauties.  Please feel free to add your own.

One was the definition of getting older – various insights/comments were shared

1.     Sitting on the toilet you discover a watermelon seed in the folds of your stomach.  The worrying thing is you cannot remember when you last ate a watermelon.
2.     You suddenly find the need to sit when putting on socks
3.     You suddenly find the need to pee when laughing at jokes
4.     All medical personnel appear to have barely finished primary school to you
5.     People in authority ask you weird questions like who is the present prime minster
6.     You think people in authority are really weird and not necessarily on your side
7.     When people ask you how you are – you really want to tell them the dire truth, including all the aches, pains and worries
8.     As you get older you don’t smell yourself, you don’t see the hair growing out of every orifice, wrinkly skin feels just as smooth as usual and you don’t hear your own farts.
9.     You learn to never take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night
10.       An "all-nighter" means not getting up to pee!
11.       You and your teeth don't sleep together anymore
12.       Your mind not only wanders. Sometimes it leaves completely
13.       Getting a little action means I don't need fibre today
14.    Getting lucky means you find your car in the car parkhe